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I have some questions about polyamory I’d like to have answered! Click here for invasive questions about your relationship satisfaction, sexual interests, and sad feelings. You will be rewarded with animal and plant pictures.
This survey is for non-monogamous people only. That means that, if you wanted to, you and/or your partner(s) could date and/or have sex with more than one person, without violating the rules of your relationship. If you do not have any partners but expect that you would be nonmonogamous if you did, you are nonmonogamous. If you and your partner are both dating only each other, but could date other people if you chose, you are nonmonogamous.
If you are monogamous and take this survey you will not get to answer any questions. You will merely be redirected to the following image of a sad puppy:
Thing of Things 
Pingback: Why Are So Many Rationalists Polyamorous? | Living Within Reason
I find the spouses question offensive!
More seriously, i have internal problem with whether to call my fully serious (as in, basically what other people would call spouses) relationship partners that way. Because of variety of reasons. Hmmm, what to do, what to do….
Oh, considering the following questions, it’s clear you are asking about ‘married’, (not necessarily legally) specifically. Well, zero then. In retrospect that was obvious.
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I’m glad a survey is being done, but there are a few things about the design that could be improved, including defining terms (eg. rationalist, primary/secondary), addressing non-hierarchical polyamorous relationships, and the gender question currently excludes all non-binary identities as well as having some confusing terminology (female and male are sexes, woman and man are genders)
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Yeah, I’d love to take it, but as a genderqueer greyromantic grey-asexual person, I couldn’t get past the demographic questions.
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None of the questions are required! Also, I understand that the words I’m using don’t describe the diversity of people’s orientations and genders: it’s totally okay to just round yourself to whatever seems closest.
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I’m not monogamous, but I’ve been struggling to complete this survey using it’s terms. My lifestyle fits more around short “hookup” type meetings, with around 25 new people every year, some of whom become my FWB for a couple of months, or come back to my city to visit me for a week. Some people I only met once, but we still keep in contact, and may meet at a later date if I come to their city. I think it doesn’t really fit this survey’s conception of rigid hierarchical relationships.
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My response to one question is maybe wrong because “metamours” is a mysterious non-word to me.
But then, I’m probably going to spoil your pretty survey data anyway with my bitterness at the dawning realization that I should stop being poly because it’s just a license to chase novelty and cheat rather than a healthy way of organizing relationships.
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The loneliness questions didn’t work well for me – I am pretty happy with my existing romantic/sexual relationships as romantic/sexual relationships, but I feel a pretty strong lack of other sorts of connections to people.
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It would have been good to clarify whether those questions mean “with people in general”, “with partners”, or “with non-partners”. I went with “in general”
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I appreciate the inclusion of asexuality even though I am not asexual, I just hardly ever choose to have sex. But the survey needs to be fixed to not exclude “nonsexual, non romantic primary partners” then. My long term relationships, which involve going on vacation together, sometimes living together, staying over all the time, and sharing money, are platonic by design. But we check all the satisfaction boxes in your survey after 20 years so I did the survey anyway, nyah. It’s like 10 years ago when me and one of these long term platonic partners played “the newlywed game” with a neighbor and her boyfriend. We knew everything about each other and the official boyfriend and girlfriend struggled to keep up. Sexual/romantic =/= serious/successful.
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